All Around the World with the Most Travelled Indian
By NITIN GAIROLA
“We have two lives, and the second begins when we realize we only have one” – Confucius
How many days do we really have in 1 lifetime? A normal life is around 80 years these days. But the first 20 years may be less impactful since in those years you are not control of your own life. So it’s these 60 years that you can live your dreams on your own terms. But we do sleep 8 hours a day and are up for the balance 2/3rd or 16 hours. That’s 60 years * 365 days * 2/3rd waking hours = 15,000 odd days. And if on that you remove illnesses, obligations and the like, then the honest answer would probably be closer to 40 years or 10,000 days. That’s how much we really have and it’s really not that much.
It’s actually not these 10,000 days that is the problem since the end will come to all of us, sooner or later. It’s the fulfillment that you feel at the end of it that matters most. I have this thought experiment in which I imagine that I have reached my last moment (though I am not sure if I would get enough time to reflect back during my last moments). So what I do in this mind game is I list down all the things I would regret at that time. This of course assumes that I have been good to and have loved the people that have loved me and also have spent time with those that matter. So that leaves me with just a list of specific things I didn’t do, sort of like a ‘regret list’. During that final part of my life, I want my ‘regret list’ to be a blank page. Not just in the final moments, but in the final years of my life. Today it is not a blank page and that worries me from time to time.
So with each sunset, 1 day out of 10,000 goes away and we have to make our choices wisely. Of course, everyone (including me) can’t choose everything in their life. We have to do few things that are not always fun and that’s the trick too. Life doesn’t have to be full of ‘highs’ all the time. But what matters is the broad trajectory and direction that life takes, day on day. Then the rest is done by the power of compounding.
That’s why I don’t believe in motivational gurus and those who preach ‘staying positive’ every day. This is a very new western concept (mostly American) that’s spread like wildfire around the world. Kids are made to believe that they can do and be anyone they want to be. But the truth is that only dreaming big, thinking positive and staying hungry doesn’t make you achieve incredible results. You can’t be positive and motivated every day; it is unnatural to be so. So my two bits on this are that we should not try to seek motivation from others but instead should just be disciplined every day. Every day do not move from A to B and then go back from B to A. Instead go from A to B and then stay there. Next day it’s B to C and so on and so forth. Then you will see the magic of discipline when you have transformed from A at the start to Z at the end.
The biggest left handed compliment one can receive is by an old acquaintance (say at a reunion) when they say that ‘oh, you look just the same’ or ‘oh, you haven’t changed a bit’. With my ever youthful boyish looks, I used to face this often. But many missed a huge part of the story. I wasn’t the same. I had come back from a journey few had taken in the past. My 20 years in between then & now felt like 200, with all the things that happened in my life.
That’s why I advise one should not just have a ‘to-do’ list or dare I say a ‘bucket list’ (I dislike the term), but one should have a ‘to-be’ list as well. Most of us don’t face the mirror and ask the question whether they like the person that’s looking back at them. Who do you want to be? And the best part is that you don’t have to be anyone else, just have to know who you are, where you are and where you have to go. If you copy others, you will always have anxieties, probably fall short, and in the end will not be the original anyway.
So the sensible advice can be to find your own unique goals, your own path and to be yourself. We do what we can do, so don’t try to do what someone else can. Isn’t that what happens to most of us in the rat race? If you are the first to do something, then the best part is that there is no book written about it. It’s your white space to colour and your blank page to fill.
There is another thought experiment that I have. I imagine how others are introducing me at a gathering. I have been introduced many times in the past as I am sure many of you have been too. Besides most of us have been subjected to the ‘So what do you do?’ question. To answer this difficult question you have to know who are you, not just in your mind but in that of others. And if the answer is not to your liking, then the next step is a choice that you have to make – to either transform or to live with it.
I realized that before this foray into extreme world ‘travel’, I was an ordinary person and I was reminded of it every time anyone got a chance to. And then ‘overnight’ there was this amazing story to tell and today my introductions are very different, but they can be better still. I want to be introduced as the first Asian and the first Indian to visit all biomes of Earth, all deserts on Earth, all forests on Earth, all continental & oceanic plates of the world and the list of ‘firsts’ can go on and on (But for that I need to complete all these records first). Best of all, I want to earn the introduction of the ‘Most Travelled Indian’. It’s a big dream, but as someone once said – ‘if your dreams don’t scare you, they are not big enough’. But my big dreams are not just castles in the air; they are being achieved through perseverance, discipline and with a lot of patience (and impatience).
Some people have made comments that ‘I am running away from my responsibilities’. My life partner, Richa, and I chose not to have children so that we could travel the entire world. 15 years ago, that was a bold call. We completely went against the grain and the advice of many around us. But our dreams were big and we were resolute. We felt a child would come in the way of this kind of adventure travel so we took our own personal call (but we can very well understand the joy that children bring to so many of us).
Nowadays, I notice more and more couples going down the same path for the same reasons. In fact in Europe, Japan and even in our metros & state capitals, it seems like the norm with the new generation. Adventure travel is ballooning across the planet and in India right now. But I guess we spotted the trend 15 years ago when we met extreme world travellers on the road during our own travels back then. So to answer the question, I can say that I am not running away from my responsibilities, instead I am running towards my dreams’. I want my ‘regret list’ to be a blank page. And I don’t just want to do; I want to be.
Nitin Gairola is from Dehradun and has travelled the natural world more than almost any Indian ever. He has set world travel records certified by India Book of Records, has written for Lonely Planet, and holds National Geographic conservation certifications. He is also a senior corporate executive in an MNC and in his early days, used to be a published poet as well. More than anything else, he loves his Himalayan home.
