By Alok Joshi
Recently, during my stay in the US, I received a big surprise. It was a letter written by an American grandma in her mid-80s (lovingly addressed as “Nana”). In fact, it was an invitation to me and my family to celebrate Thanksgiving at her huge and beautiful farm house. After ages, somebody had hand-written a letter to me. It was a sweet and affectionate gesture.
It made me wonder something. Haven’t we lost the practice of writing letters? When was the last time we wrote or received a handwritten letter? This beautiful form of communication has been usurped at the hands of technology, texts and tweets. The initial damage and ruin were started by the advent of telegraph, telephone and typewriter.
Until the close of the 20th century, handwritten letters were the main form of communication with the external world. We all have grown up watching movies where the soldiers guarding us at the borders anxiously wait for the postman to bring the letters from their loved ones. Many of us from the earlier generation used to write and receive letters from pen-pals in foreign lands whom we had never met. As adolescents, love letters were exchanged secretly. They were as precious and valuable as the mobile phones in modern times.
The ink pen has now become almost extinct. As school-children, sharing pens or ink were a part of friendship. If our pen ran out of ink, the best friend would come to our rescue. Nowadays, if you have to borrow a pen, nobody carries it on person. In a bank, somebody might oblige by giving you his/her pen but most probably will hold back the cover just in case you run away with it. We keep all our hard-earned money in banks and trust them with it. But the banks do not trust us. No wonder, cheap and ordinary ordinary ball-pens provided in the banks for customers are tied to stands or locked to avoid theft.
The internet has given us many things but sadly taken away the art of letter writing. In the modern-day fast paced world, we have no time for anybody. We think letter writing is an obsolete and quaint form of communication.
I remember having received a few letters from my dad when I first started working away from home. Each word was inspiring and meant a lot. He never left home without his favourite pen. I also recall that, in my college days, I had a blind student in my class. He used to request me to write letters to his father. I used to read out his letters, which meant so much for him. He was the happiest person the day he got a letter from home.
Today, I am a published author but I owe my flair for writing to my habit of writing letters to my relatives as a young boy. It taught me how to express myself and my feelings clearly. I learnt that the most important person in the process of writing is the reader on the other side. Words are powerful. They have emotions. They can hurt the other person unknowingly. Any amount of explanation cannot take back our words. I have seen relationships being broken on mere text messages. Hence, we need to choose our words carefully.
There is a beautiful story about Einstein’s mother. When Albert Einstein was in elementary school, his teacher sent a small note with him. Albert could not read so he asked his mother. As she read the letter, there were tears in her eyes. She told Albert that he was so smart that one day he would change the world. So, they could no longer teach him. She started teaching Albert herself at home. Later, after his mother’s death. Albert found out the handwritten note of the teacher and was shocked to read it. The teacher had written that Albert was dumb and would not be able to achieve anything in life. He was filled with compassion for his mother who did not give up on her son and made him what he was.
I think handwritten communication in the form of letters, cards and notes need to make a comeback now more than ever. The printed birthday or anniversary cards are self-contained poor substitutes leaving nothing for us to add. We have become impersonal in our personal relations. Writing can be a stress-buster and a creative way of self-expression. When someone finds time to write to you, it cements the bonding because it is more valuable and personal than a digital letter. In contrast, a romantic email lacks spontaneity because it can be edited or even deleted.
Many people complain and attend classes to improve their spoken communication. There is no need. If we develop the art of writing, our oral communication will also improve tremendously.
How about making a start today by picking up pen and paper? Write something to your loved ones, your old and lonely parents or maybe your childhood friends. I promise you will feel good.
(Alok Joshi is an HR Advisor, a freelance writer, motivational speaker and author of two books)
