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I wish I had…


By Pooja Marwah

Resilience: Capacity to recover from a difficult situation; ability to spring back!

It takes a lot for some to just push themselves out of bed each morning but they do welcome a new day. It takes a lot for each of us to find something out of the ordinary in life, but we never stop searching. It takes a lot for some to keep flirting with failure until success decides to come up the wrought iron ladder with a rose and serenade them… But they wait patiently. Isn’t that what contributes to resilience?

A lot of times in life, we have the capability to do something but lack ability. There are always numerous things that hold accountability, needless to say that a person’s own will top the list. In this, hypothetically speaking, if the will was in full potential but things just didn’t pan out the way you envision them to be, what would you do next?

Give up, find a better pasture or … or…

Pour yourself a stiff shot of caffeine, fermented grape or barley… and once the first gulp calms the insides of the oesophagus, let out a deep breath and start over. It ain’t gonna be easy… but then easy is never worth it! The fear of failure actually isn’t the worst thing in the world… regret is. Imagine looking back at life and wondering on the what if! Wouldn’t that be a wasted existence?

Regret churns out dissatisfaction. It also does wonders to ego, fear and self-obsession… and I do imply a tint of sarcasm here. For if you have life, you truly have it at your disposal to use as you deem fit. So why let it breeze by with ‘I wish I had’. If you want to do something differently, do it. If your heart craves what’s not yours to have, change the ‘not yours.’ Don’t let yourself turn around with a possibility of wondering why you didn’t have the ability to move, when you had the capability!!

It is totally okay to fail but somewhere as adults, we view failure as the end. We take it hard on ourselves and create a self-made wall which prevents opportunity and risk from knocking… and slowly over time, the space we make becomes a place of solace and we remain there, seeming content. Even in an embryo, after a stipulated time, the baby does come out… A caterpillar may form a cocoon but it’s the butterfly that gets to see the world. If we were meant to be in one place, we would have had roots instead of feet,


Failure is often misconstrued as a lack of skill, but in actuality, it is a stepping stone for success. No matter how many attempts it takes, in the end, the person that wins is the one who was relentless. It is a mindset for growth in every which way. For with failure, you approach everything as an opportunity to enrich learning to be better.

A past Miss USA says of her victory that the only reason she had the coveted crown was because she bounced right back, after losing 6 times in 6 years!! The 7 year itch worked for the young lady as it will for you… May take 7 months, weeks or days, if you have a splash of luck … but eventually it will happen if you have the courage to pursue!

So dream… for as a wise man said, ‘if your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough.’

And Aim – to quote Og Mandion, “Failure will never overtake you if you have a determination strong enough.”

And be as shameless and as ruthless as you can be, for in the end, not every day is a good day, but you live anyway. Not all you love will love you back, but you love anyway. Not all deals are fair but you play fair anyway.

And no matter how many attempts it takes… try anyway. The way forward is the only way to go. There are only so many trips you will take around the sun. So, if there is something inside of you that you want solely for you… go after it, anyway.